Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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