pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
