Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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