i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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