I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize