i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
