There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Randomize