You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
jump out the window naked night went bad
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
