I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
