Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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