You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
