Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Randomize
