That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
