So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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