turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize
