Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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