Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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