when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
