I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
and she was petting her beer can
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
im holly from the hills drunk
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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