Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
