I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize