I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Randomize
