Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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