and my herpes radar will keep us safe
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Randomize
