how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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