3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
did you just send me my own nude
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
