he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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