all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
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