I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize