apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
