Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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