normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
a search helicopter?!
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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