Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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