STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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