Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
