I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
