goodnight i made you a song goodbye
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
