the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
