dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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