Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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