I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
