You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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