Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
