I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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