I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
