That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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