I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
