So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
