he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
