On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
pop tarts are not kleenex
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
